....



Not very often but in these days I feel quite down. Wing asked me what was happened but I hardly explain my feeling. It is a much hidden sad emotion but I guess it still shows on my face. It comes from a deep feeling of the loneliness in my art journey. One day I finished a painting that I like it so much; it made me happy for a day. Two days later I looked at it and then I started to dislike it. I want to redo it again...

It is very difficult to deal with the emotional cycle again and again. I feel I have never made a successful painting, and I feel my "so call art talent" is no longer with me. I am sad to have the "never satisfy" attitude, but I'm sad also if I give up to paint.

Why I'm so hard to please? Sometime I wish I'm like a robot, keep on working without the sense of emotion.

May be I'm just too harsh to myself....